Wednesday, June 06, 2007

A Night in the Life of a Medical Student Who Procrastinated

"Haha, you asking Kok? He's the guy that called me two days before the University examination asking me for the time, venue and the order of the subjects we are being tested."

Shaki, answering before I could,
when someone asked me about a class test

This is just another short, filler post. You'll get a lot of these this month.

Right now it's past 4 am. I just completed my insane load of backed-up Self-Directed and Independent Learning Microbiology assignments. There's a visible dent on the lateral side of the middle finger on my right hand where a pen rested on for the past 5 hours. The proximal interphalangeal joint of my little finger (on the same hand) is now killing me after being scraped repeatedly over and over again across the page of my assignment notebook from carving out lines after lines of condensed factoids which I harvested from three Microbiology textbooks that are probably heavy enough to kill a small elephant with adequate trajectory.

On my desk was two empty cans of Amul's Kool Café which I favoured over the other brands (mainly because they use 'K' instead of 'C' for 'Kool'). Sitting not to too far away from them is an empty packet of Cheetos, which was my dinner and supper all-in-one because I simply couldn't find the time to get away for a bite. There's another packet of Cheetos on the floor beside my chair but I seriously doubt that I'm going to open it anytime soon. Synthetic cheese flavoured cornmeal crisps do not agree well with my stomach (or my epicurean taste buds either, for that matter). I have 261 songs on my Winamp playlist (plus a few thousand more stored up somewhere), and most of their lyrics have already been committed to my memory through a constant regimen of overexposure and chronic conditioning. Sometimes, I even leave the music playing when I sleep. I have less nightmares that way.


A little more than an hour ago about 3 am, the fluorescent tube that functions as the sole illuminant of my bedroom come study-room come media-room began to flicker rapidly. Had I been a photosensitive epileptic, I'd seize up like one of House's patient o' the week, hit my noggin on the corner of my desk, and die bleeding like a pig. Thankfully, I'm not a photosensitive epileptic - or an epileptic of any kind. Now, where was I? Oh yea, fluorescent stroboscopic discotheque WTF.

After each successive blink, the fluorescent lamp dimmed perceptibly. The room became darker and darker, and soon, I found myself sitting in total inky blackness with my pen still resting in its groove in my middle finger and my lips making the shapes of the syllables "Oh" and "Fuck" mutely - in that order. Then a minute later, the fluorescent-lamp-that-died began to flicker back to life again; an encore of its earlier light-and-soundless show, only this time, in reverse. I'm no expert when it comes to electrical stuff, but I'm quite sure fluorescent tubes aren't allowed to do that. I'll go check with their union.

A year ago, such a bizarre domestic phenomenon would no doubt kick my ultra-fertile imagination into hyperdrive. I would have panicked and started praying to the gods in all the world's major religions. I might have even leapt into bed and curled up like a... err... wuss1 under my blanket. But just now when it happened, all I did was grope about for my cellphone for a bit of light, and wonder if I can substitute the the dead tube with the one in my anteroom so I can resume my mountain o' work.

Medical school does that to people, y'know? It kills your imagination.

Okay, my self-alloted break is now over. I'm going to start swotting for that stupid Haematology test I'm going to sit for in a few short hours. Pretty pointless post, huh? I thought so too.

Back to work,
k0k s3n w4i

1 I'm trying hard not to use the 'P' word here.


pinksterz said...

they don't kill your imagination lah.

only make you a bit berani lor.

*LMAO imagining a 'chicken' leaping onto his bed and hide like a wuss under his blanket (pink maybe?)*

sXydeViL said...

When's ur bday? Heard the test was tough?

Jen said...

blinking lights? a sign from the powers above.

start dancing, boy.

(clothes are optional, though recommended. got any poles lying about?)

niCk said...

aha! that happened when i was going to open my SDL book.

thank God that it came back. or else i would have seriously leapt onto my bed.


k0k s3n w4i said...

@Kak Ellina
My blanket is blue, ok. manly blue.
Courage is the ability to face one's fear. You can't have courage if you have no fear. And you can't have fear if you have no imagination.

My birthday coincides with France's Bastille Day (or Fete de la Revolution), which commemorates the start of the French Revolution when the people stormed the Bastille prison in Paris in 1789.
The test was okay, I think. Just hope I pass.

God wants me to boogie in my room at 3 am? it's more probably a sign for me to pay the electric bill. I'm 3 months behind ;p

I thought I'm the only insane late-night (very early morning?) swotter. Next time I come disturb you.

Crux said...

The lights have started flickering. Soon, the door will start creaking. The dogs will start howling. The guards will start dying. Bloody scrawls on the field will hint at what's coming.

And then, when you hear the last guard drop dead, when you hear the last howl fading, when the light bulbs all cease to function, when you hear the teeth chattering in the darkness, a distant laugh, and when a sense of overwhelming dread seizes you and you feel that there is simply no fighting it, then, you will know it's time.. find a new apartment.

michellesy the woefully busy said...

I was about to wish you good luck for the exam, but I was too late =(

Been absolutely snowed under with my rotation as well. If I have to do one more chart review, I'm going to go into the patient's room and vomit on him/ her.

Hah - so who's got the GI tract disturbance now =P

k0k s3n w4i said...

Couldn't have put it in words better myself, LOL. It's been awhile since you last update your site, man. Get on it!

No you aren't! The exam's next week! (or the week after - I'm not really sure come to think of it). Exam. Test. Different entities. Same modus operandi of striking terror.
Get a picture of the patient you puke on, okay! XD

michellesy who's still in the loop (hopefully) said...

In that case, all the best =D

For once I am not entirely out of the loop *winks*

I have no social life to speak of, but that's a coping mechanism to maintain my sanity until the end of this rotation =D