Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Crash Cart Chaos

"Dammit. Since I started that one quote per post thing in my blog, I have to keep finding quotes to put at the start of every post now."

Me, to Beve via MSN Messenger while I was writing this post

Remember when I first started this blog, I wrote a post (with pictures) about how I spotted 3 minor road traffic accidents happening one after the other within the span of 15 minutes (2 of which even happened at the same junction?). Here's that post;

Yesterday night1 was only my first night in Malacca and already, I got to watch TWO rather serious crash-'em-trash-'ems happening very close to one another. I'm starting to think that my physical presence in any place increases the chance for accidents to happen.

And no, you may not crack jokes about how my crappy driving causes them to occur - it did not. I'll have you know that I'm a very careful driver. I have never put so much as a single dent or scratch in any car I drove. Plus, I have a spotless clean traffic record - no speeding tickets, nothing - and that's achieved without even needing to bribe anybody either, okay!

Now, back to the post. Here's the first boo boo;

Accident #1

At 3.30 am, I felt kind of peckish, so I went out to look for grub. I headed to Melaka Raya, where I remember a certain 24-hour Yong Tau Foo shop is located. When I got there, I noticed that the traffic light right in front of the Senyum Super Supermarket (opposite Yong Peng, that Yong Tau Foo place) had been pulverized into a scrap yard reject. The picture above depicts the car that did the deed, parked a few metres in front of said wrecked traffic light.

I have no idea why the driver left his car there, but I guess he just wasn't thinking straight. I mean, you obviously have all sorts of colourful, psychedelic stuff discoing through your blood if you drove right into a traffic light, right? They are bright, stationary objects that changes colour - and they aren't even on the road! Either that or the hippie car-driver-guy got hurt enough to be carted off to the nearest hospital (where presumably, they'll finally find out what shit that dude had been smoking).

Die, bitch. Die!

Now, that's the way to get angry at traffic lights. Ram those fuckers down with your car! That ought to teach them to switch just when you reach them.

A piece of the action, literally.

And I parked beside another piece, right across the road.

The second accident involves two cars, about 50 metres up the road (not down the road, I hope you know the difference). You can actually see a bit of it in the first picture of this post. Come 'ere. Lemme zoom it in for you;

02 copy
This picture is just for the sake of giving you an idea of the distance between the two hits.

At first, I didn't dare to get close to take pictures because there was a whole crowd of dangerous looking people there. I suppose it's part of Malaysian's barbaric practice of calling all the gangsters you know to back you up in a car accident argument - you know, whoever got the most numerous and vicious gangsters on their side wins.

Anyway, because of that, this was the closest picture I got before they towed the cars apart;

Taken from that mamak place at Senyum Super. I went there for a glass of ice lime tea after Yong Peng. To help digestion. Yea. Thaaat's right.

I wondered whether I should call the cops just so I can get close enough to take pictures and the gangsters can't do shit to me in case the squabble gets ugly and people get hurt or something. I mean, it's bad if people get hurt right? But, I decided against it in the end though. That's mainly because a patrol car happened to be passing through there and spotted the lot of them (you can't miss 'em - there was enough people there to start their own Merdeka Day parade).

Everyone cleared off once the coppers arrived - and apparently, the car owners vamoosed as well (according to an innocent bystander). Maybe they had fun stuff in their blood too.

The cars involved were;

Yellow Proton Satria.

Black car of indeterminate breed and species. That's because I'm just really lousy when it comes to identifying cars. I don't even know what sort of car my mom drives.

From what I gathered, the yellow car was probably driving along the road when the black car came out of a junction - both trying to break the sound barrier, no doubt. Black barreled into yellow, and both spun out of control. Considering the damage the front of the yellow car took, I'd say it was the one that totaled the ornamental bush and fancy lamp post (both in picture above) when the pair rode up the kerb.

No one died, unfortunately. Just thought maybe you wanna know.

Cruisin' jinx,
k0k s3n w4i

1 Okay, maybe not yesterday night per se. "Earlier this morning" would be more accurate.


bevE said...

first comment in the past few months! i get dibs. xD

er. dunno what else to comment. -.-

i like the strikethrough - "just so I can get close enough to take pictures and the gangsters can't do shit to me", and you have nth better to quote? =.=

gnite k0kee !

thanatos said...

i dun think it's ur physical presence that's causing the fact i think it's MY physical absence that's causing it.....hehehe....

well, that's a way to make myself more important....

anyway happy as much wan tan mee, yong tau hu, poh piah, satay celup, chicken rice etc as u can...


InnShan said...

omg, i hope u r really not one of those crazy mlccan drivers. my dear life will b on ur steerings on d coming trip k?

go practice driving around 1st. i don't want to die young n virgin...haha.

sXydeViL said...

u sound like a reporter u noe? lol. good lar. u sud confront ur mum one day why didnt she enroll u in jounalism?

malacca needs a reporter like. Kempen driving awareness kononyer. sleep lar night ghost.

k0k s3n w4i said...

s'bout time too >_>
Be honoured. Your name is mentioned in the quote. I don't do that everyday, y'know.

we'll share the credit, LOL.
And don't worry. I'll eat everything thrice. then travel to penang and KL and eat somemore xD

You got insurance right?

you dun get to write this way in newspapers anyway. lest i start my own newspaper. I always wonder why news aren't written in a funnier style. no reason why we couldn't be entertained and informed simultaneously.

Adrian Tan said...

I think the black car of "indeterminate breed and species" is a brand new BMW E90 3 series and a kick ass AC Schnitzer rims. I wonder if those shoes are real or replicas. Pity the car. Heartaching to see such hot car being driven by a complete moron. Ok, I'm just being mean.

k0k s3n w4i said...

@adrian tan
Adrian Tan from Bandar Hilir primary?
I imagined it to be the black car's fault anyway. Go ahead, By all means, be mean!