"Who would give a law to lovers? Love is unto itself a higher law."The Consolation of Philosophy (524)
by Boethius, Christian philosopher
The following video is the heart and subject of this article and if you choose not to watch it, all of the following text you read here will not be terribly meaningful to you. Be warned because the video will disgust you; and depending on what you are disgusted by precisely, I shall know what sort of human being you are,
"As Africans, we want to ask Barack Obama to explain to us: is this what he wants
to bring to Africa as a human right to EAT DA POO POO OF OUAH CHILDREN!?" LOL.
It's okay to laugh. I laughed my shit out the first time I saw it.
The excitable firebrand talking in the video calls himself Pastor "Dr" Martin Ssempa, which I must stress is not a medical doctor. I feel the need to do so because this foul breed of alleged Christians love to use their stupid, worthless biblical doctorates to lend themselves an air of legitimacy and authority. He is an odious, odious little man who is at the forefront of the anti-homosexual detractivism in Uganda, a country quite infamous for its harsh criminalisation of same-sex relationships. I'm talking of up to 14 years of imprisonment here; a crazy long time to be put away. The atmosphere of civil and human rights on the African continent is a suffocating breathe - this is a place where despicable Christian and Muslim men would inflict "corrective rape" on lesbians in attempts to cure them of their homosexuality. You might remember the chilling murder of Eudy Simelane who was gang-raped and brutally beaten before being stabbed 25 times in her face, chest and legs two years ago; all for being a lesbian and an equal rights campaigner.
She's certainly cured of homosexuality now alright.
In March last year, a trio of widely discredited American evangelical Christian kooks landed on Ugandan soil and preached to thousands of Ugandans about the "hidden and dark [gay] agenda", and that "the gay movement is an evil institution" which aims "to defeat the marriage-based society and replace it with a culture of sexual promiscuity." And the three rabble-rousing gits made these fantastic claims without having a single shred of evidence to back them up, of course.
Their misleading, hateful and bigoted talks - in which one guy even asserted that homosexuality is akin to child molestation and bestiality - led directly to the genesis of the Ugandan Anti-Homosexuality Bill in April 2009 which will introduce the DEATH PENALTY to homosexuals arrested by the state. Allow me to reiterate: they are ready to FUCKING MURDER people for being what they are, for committing a victimless crime and for falling in love with someone who just happens to be a member of their own gender. I ask, at which point in time did unusual pairings become more deplorable than taking another person's life?
This is the brand of Christianity that Martin Ssempa engenders. He is one of the bill's staunchest advocates. By his own admission, he also enjoys "researching" scat porn in his leisure time. I have this creepy feeling that the "gay" porn he showed to his audience (and also thrust into the bishop's face, haha) in the video above actually came from his own private collection.
The pastor doth protest too much, methinks.
He's wearing that intense expression on his face because he is POO POO'ing in some other bloke's mouth.
What more, he's a liar. Surprise, surprise!
The practices of FEESTING, ANAL LEACKING and EATING DA POO POO are NOT exclusively homosexual behaviour; I've personally seen anilingus and vaginal fisting in heterosexual porn. Neither are these acts as commonly practiced between homosexual couples as Martin Ssempa wants you and his brain-dead flock of sheeples to believe. Scatophilia and coprophagy in particular, are particularly rare paraphilias in themselves and a 1999 Finnish study published in the Journal of Sex Research found no statistically significant difference between homosexual (17%) and heterosexual (18%) sadomasochist males when it comes to dabbling in the brown arts.
So yeah, it's scientifically documented that straight dudes also EAT DA POO POO ALL OBAH DA PLASE.
Quickly, someone must inform Martin Ssempa about this so he can help draft a legislation against heterosexuals too - and kill the fuck out of everyone.
And so what if two consenting adults of the same sex make love or eat each others poop? They are not hurting anyone, aren't they? Also, I think you must really, really love someone to be willing to eat that person's poop (girls, faster go ask your boyfriends if they love you enough to eat your poop). Still, in my capacity as a medical student, I feel that it is my duty to inform everyone that chowing down on another person's shit, whether you are straight or gay, is generally considered to be a Bad Idea.
As a message to my Christian friends and readers: pastors, preachers and priests often tell filthy lies to further their agendas of discrimination and intolerance, so I urge caution when listening to the messages they try to pass on to you. I have personally seen it in action. Right now, Martin Ssempa is spreading falsehoods with the authority of God behind him and sanctioning murder in Jesus' name in Uganda. What are all you enlightened, loving, moderate Christians going to do about it?
Nothing, I bet.
Now, to end this post on a lighter note, watch this Auto-Tune remix of the above video. This is why I love, love, love the internet,
"Like ice-cream! Like ice-cream!" So freaking... catchy! Must... dance!
Read also: Why We Should Accept Gay People, an older post of mine which defended homosexuality.
He who pooh-poohs religious nuts,
k0k s3n w4i